You my wonder how I not quit with this trading game when I have ridiculous days like this, how I'm not fed up to the point of leaving it all behind me?
My answer is that if we put money aside I really like discovering hidden rooms of my own psyche that get opened this way. Money on account is small now so I'm not getting killed financially. There are many interesting points for me to think about after today. Like why I'm so inclined to trade so impatiently with fear that I will lose opportunity? After I lose some and decide that I lost opportunity is that self aggression from that point (after yellow mark)?
In hindsight I was holding my ground until those two stops at 10:40. Five pip stop with 4 pip spread wasn't enough by just few pips. Then I lost it. I was buying and got stopped out. Then after some point it was obvious if I get bounce it wouldn't mean a thing, but I kept buying and getting stopped. Maybe getting bottom is ego thing (probably like getting top), so if I get it I wouldn't feel so bad?
-100 pips
