Messing around

I don't prefer trading like this. It's big win or big loss, loss is usually bigger. Also when there is big loss it can mess my head for following days or longer.

My plan at least for that third full size trade was to close it at b/e if it didn't go my way. I should have done that when it kept going down again after 11:00 news. I simply forgot or it was too fast.
Problematic is also that I don't want to get size lighter when I'm in a black. Greed kicks in and I want all profits from big position, small then isn't enough. On first three trades b/e price was 386, I had many opportunities to take profit without exposing myself to big risk any more. After last trade b/e was 380. It's crazy how I don't wan't to close around b/e even tough just two minutes before I was 40 pips of standard size in red on my whole position.

+43 pips